You probably don’t believe how funny Real Estate could be, unless you were a buyer or seller and your sale turned out entirely different than how you imagined or needed it to.
Many of the people I met on the ‘Rocky Road of Real Estate’ in the 70s and 80s were fun to observe as they attempted to succeed in a job with more failures than successes than most other professions! If by chance you became a Rock Star, you were incredibly LUCKY!
You probably won’t believe this is the truth of how the ‘Profession’ really worked! Unfortunately, it hasn’t changed much since those years. Maybe more rules, but the buying and selling is damn close. I can’t prove it as a Realtor, as I am retired; however, as a buyer and seller of Real Estate, the results are pretty much the same.
The Broker then didn’t give a damn if you made a dime! His only interest was that you bring as many of your relatives and friends who bought or sold with his company as you could in the few months you lasted before you burned out from the immense physical and mental pressure and labor.
Your basic training was to do what everyone else did, only do it better or get lucky! Your task was to fill out one of the single-page legal contracts with several hand-and-clothes-stained carbons, like the ones in the drawer in the files, similar to your sale. Half the time you guessed, and guess who paid the price for your mistakes? I learned how to write a tight listing and sales contract by shadowing my Title employees and Mortgage Lenders.
Truth: almost no sales are alike! Hot damn, you got a listing! Now price it right! Easy right? Most Sellers think like they are selling a mansion, while most buyers think they are paying for a shed!
My favorite saying was: “Buyers are liars, Sellers are yellers!”
To find comps (comparable sales), you trekked to the County Courthouse and spent part of a day pulling dusty volumes of books containing the addresses and sale prices of homes within a mile of your little jewel!
In case you think I just had a fun time selling Real Estate! Let me tell you about one of my fun clients: Tip-over Tom was a truck driver for a pulp Company. He earned the nickname by accidentally tipping his truck in a ditch at least once. I listed his house, about an acre in town, with a stand of Timber on it! To say he was proud of that timber would be an understatement!
Tom found a house in the country and was so in love with it that I could not talk him out of it, and believe me, I tried! The land was swampy, and the house had so many problems that I feared the appraisal would be half the sale price.
The master bedroom was built higher than the rest of the house and had an impressive picture window overlooking his land. When we viewed it the first time, the seller’s agent accompanied us without my permission. It had rained that morning, and there was a lot of moisture on the master bedroom ceiling, with drops of water actually dripping. That hotshot seller said, “That’s just moisture because the house is built so tight!” I didn’t argue with him in front of Tom, but vowed to be there for the appraisal and inspection. Looking around, I pointed out that the faucets in the master bath weren’t hooked up to water. The Agent said it would all be ‘taken care of,’ probably by closing, but not to worry because his contractor was a professional!’
He may have fooled Tom, but he didn’t fool me. I always met the Home Inspectors on my listings and my sales. The roof did not pass inspection, and there was a long list of repairs and a new roof before closing. I wouldn’t let Tom back down on any of the defaults. Licensed contractors had to do all the repairs BEFORE CLOSING!.
Before closing, we got a sale on Tom’s house, and he screamed at me several times that he would not sell unless he was paid handsomely for his Timber. He knew it was valuable; after all, he drove a truck for a pulp company. I explained to him several times that if he wanted the proceeds from the sale of the timber, he needed to take care of it BEFORE an offer was made. I explained more than once that if he accepted the offer minus the timber, his company doing the clearing would be responsible for ANY DAMAGE to the property. To say he was pissed would be another understatement.
I set an appointment to show him the sales contract on his house and asked my hubby to come with me. His wife was afraid Tom might hit me or something. I was not worried. I told Shirl, “Now, when I show Tom the contract, he is going to scream and holler for about an hour! We will sit still and just let him rant. He will not hit me! Do not say a word to him, no matter how loud he gets!” Shirl promised, so off we went.
Tom did exactly what I said he would do. After an hour, he calmed down and said, “I suppose I will have to sign this if I want the other house where I can go fishing and hunting on my own land, don’t I?”
I said, “Yes, you will if you want the house in the country.” I put the ballpoint pen on the contract and kept quiet. We finally agreed that the Timber was valuable, but the cost and the risk to his existing house were concerns. He signed, and on the way home, Shirl said, “Were you really sure he wouldn’t hit you?”
“Yes, he wanted that swamp land and that house, and he finally realized that in order to get what he wanted, he had to sell that house.
This is my proof that “Buyers are liars and Sellers are Yellers!”
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To read my past blogs, click on “Posts”, and you can scroll through the list on my website at www.brendacolbathbooks.com and my more than 20 books, from children’s books to Adult books, including a sexy sci/fi called Immortal Enemies. My daughter read it with her eyes closed.
Hope your day is filled with fun and love. See you next time…
